Steven P. BarrettOBAMA'S WORST NIGHTMARE: HE GETS "PINNED" AND CAN'T GET OUT
August 27th 2008 19:41
By Steven Barrett
Remember all that fuss about Barak Obama not wearing a flag lapel pin? Well, I guess he’s starting to wear one more often lately. Besides, I’m more interested in knowing what’s under the skin wearing the suits; mostly likely working brain cells and heart tissues. Yet, since abortion’s a big issue this year, I got to thinking about those Precious Feet pins and they got me thinking of a Pro-Lifer's ideal nightmare scenario for Obama.
Imagine the effusively smooth-talking apostle of all purpose "Change" (none of us can take seriously) going to a dentist for an emergency filling. But it turns out he's the real nervous type so the doc agrees to give him some knockout juice.
Off he goes into dreamland, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz just imagining his first walk to the White House after watching the parade -- but when he wakes up, he suddenly realizes that his staffers didn't "ideologically vet out" the dentist and he got one of those people who take life seriously, so seriously in fact that he wants to teach Obama a permanent but harmless, albeit embarrassing lesson.
The good dentist takes out of his pockets one of the Pro-Life Precious Feet pins and finagles them into becoming a PERMANENT piece of tongue-pierced "jewelry" for the Maestro of Change. That pin featuring those golden piggies is locked in his ever eloquent tongue for good, folks: FOR GOOD!
Wouldn't you love to be there and take it all in when Obama wakes up and discovers to his horror that not only the dentist is long gone, but he looks into the mirror and sees something very unexpected. A shiny but haunting reminder of something. ()Wow! -- is this baby shining. And like I said above, it’s in there for good.
The story’s, er, the Big O’s nightmare isn’t over, yet. Only a few hours later, he has to appear on national television to give a major speech to a combined fundraiser put on by the National Abortion Rights Action League (NARAL), Planned Parenthood Foundation, the National Organization for Women, and Catholics for A Free Choice. And this sucker’s been scheduled months in advance, the media’s been awaiting for him to “clarify” his Saddleback Mountain “higher pay grade” comments and there’s buckets and buckets of blood money to be sucked up for his campaign. There’s no way this side of hell he can duck this.
He'd like to call his old preacher pal, THE Rev'd Jeremiah Wright, but the latter thinks Obama's diss'd and done him wrong. Scratch Wright. No help from Jesse Jackson either. Besides, he's having enough trouble dealing with this haunting reminder in his tongue without even wanting to grovel to Jackson who'd like to give Obama a higher speaking octave. As for Hillary, she's given him all she thinks he deserves. Besides, he's already said he has all the women in the country to help his campaign already. And if he cancels out, why there goes the baby killing vote not to mention buckets of campaign blood money. All he's got left are Al Sharpton, Al Gore and Joe Biden. His wagon circumference is getting a little tighter, just as that pin seems to be getting on his tongue.
Here’s where he wants to jump and scream out of bed because he knows he has to OPEN HIS MOUTH. If I were him, I’d stick to conning people into believing he can walk on water.
This is when he calls for his "higher paygrade."
Remember all that fuss about Barak Obama not wearing a flag lapel pin? Well, I guess he’s starting to wear one more often lately. Besides, I’m more interested in knowing what’s under the skin wearing the suits; mostly likely working brain cells and heart tissues. Yet, since abortion’s a big issue this year, I got to thinking about those Precious Feet pins and they got me thinking of a Pro-Lifer's ideal nightmare scenario for Obama.
Imagine the effusively smooth-talking apostle of all purpose "Change" (none of us can take seriously) going to a dentist for an emergency filling. But it turns out he's the real nervous type so the doc agrees to give him some knockout juice.
Off he goes into dreamland, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz just imagining his first walk to the White House after watching the parade -- but when he wakes up, he suddenly realizes that his staffers didn't "ideologically vet out" the dentist and he got one of those people who take life seriously, so seriously in fact that he wants to teach Obama a permanent but harmless, albeit embarrassing lesson.
The good dentist takes out of his pockets one of the Pro-Life Precious Feet pins and finagles them into becoming a PERMANENT piece of tongue-pierced "jewelry" for the Maestro of Change. That pin featuring those golden piggies is locked in his ever eloquent tongue for good, folks: FOR GOOD!
Wouldn't you love to be there and take it all in when Obama wakes up and discovers to his horror that not only the dentist is long gone, but he looks into the mirror and sees something very unexpected. A shiny but haunting reminder of something. ()Wow! -- is this baby shining. And like I said above, it’s in there for good.
The story’s, er, the Big O’s nightmare isn’t over, yet. Only a few hours later, he has to appear on national television to give a major speech to a combined fundraiser put on by the National Abortion Rights Action League (NARAL), Planned Parenthood Foundation, the National Organization for Women, and Catholics for A Free Choice. And this sucker’s been scheduled months in advance, the media’s been awaiting for him to “clarify” his Saddleback Mountain “higher pay grade” comments and there’s buckets and buckets of blood money to be sucked up for his campaign. There’s no way this side of hell he can duck this.
He'd like to call his old preacher pal, THE Rev'd Jeremiah Wright, but the latter thinks Obama's diss'd and done him wrong. Scratch Wright. No help from Jesse Jackson either. Besides, he's having enough trouble dealing with this haunting reminder in his tongue without even wanting to grovel to Jackson who'd like to give Obama a higher speaking octave. As for Hillary, she's given him all she thinks he deserves. Besides, he's already said he has all the women in the country to help his campaign already. And if he cancels out, why there goes the baby killing vote not to mention buckets of campaign blood money. All he's got left are Al Sharpton, Al Gore and Joe Biden. His wagon circumference is getting a little tighter, just as that pin seems to be getting on his tongue.
Here’s where he wants to jump and scream out of bed because he knows he has to OPEN HIS MOUTH. If I were him, I’d stick to conning people into believing he can walk on water.
This is when he calls for his "higher paygrade."
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Comment by S.L.
The Political Brief
Comment by Steven Barrett's OpEd Blog
How's Biden gonna do up against a Pro-Life and very accomplished feminist? Especially if she's Catholic, or a Protestant with a far better understanding of Catholic and general historical Church teachings on abortion going all the way back to the Church Fathers?
Checkmate.
Noticed how he zoomed lthrough abortion through the one stop-light town of "Nowheresville"? Makes me wonder if he's having some second thoughts about some Catholics in his inner circles who don't know even the easiest of all the easiest teachings passed down the past 2,000 years. They weren't very "wonky" on this, i.e. Biden & Pelosi, were they? Wonks would've gotten the message but framed their deceptions with a lot more precision and ambiguity. But hell's bells, let's be thankful for clumsy people now and then. Sometimes they can be our best friends. (LOL)
Now I've got an "epistle" of my own to post, then down to my man cave. Oink oink!