Steven P. BarrettNEW HAMPSHIRE: ALREADY U.S.' CHEAPEST STATE -- NOW THE MEANEST?
July 4th 2008 02:52
Steven Barrett
WARNING: IF YOU ARE A NATIVE NEW HAMPSHIRE GRANITE STATE RESIDENT, OR USED TO LIVE THERE AND ARE PROUD OF YOUR OLD HOME DIGS, YOU MAY NOT WANT TO READ THIS.
BUT IT'S LONG OVERUDE -- SO SAITH YOUR BLOGGING COMMENTATOR FROM SOUTH OF THE BORDER IN WHAT YOU FOLKS (A LOT OF YOU BEING FORMER BAY STATE CHEAPSKATES) LIKE TO CALL THE "PEOPLES' REPUBLIC OF TAXACHUSETTS."
THE FORMER BAY STATERS I'M REFERRING TO ARE THOSE WHO'LL JUMP TO WHATEVER PATCH OF GREENER GRASS THEY CAN FIND, JUST SO LONG AS IT DOESN'T REQUIRE THEM ANY EFFORT TO REACH INTO THEIR (ALREADY SHALLOW) POCKETS TO BUY.
GUESS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MOVE INTO A RURAL HICK STATE -- THAT'S STILL ABLE TO BOAST MORE BOULDERS THAN RESIDENTS WITH I.Q.s BARELY AVERAGING ABOVE AN EXTREME ENVIRONMENTALIST'S IDEAL ROOM TEMPERATURE -- FOR THE PRIMARY PURPOSE OF "SAVING TAX DOLLARS"? YOU'LL GET GREENER GRASS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE ALRIGHT. CHANCES ARE MOST OF THAT GREENER GRASS IS GROWING ABOVE SEPTIC TANKS, AND IF SOMETHING HAPPENS? WELL, MMM, YOU KNOW, STUFF HAPPENS.
Some of that stuff is what happens when "Live Free Or Die" is your state motto and your state's sole function is to get everybody living outside of New Hampshire to pay for your way of life. Back when New Hampshire was just a backwoods colony (not much improvement since) and Portsmouth was the only thing resembling a "city," there was another term for what New Hampshire practices today:
In New Hampshire this takes on a stingier aspect. After all, when you don't have an income tax or even a sales tax, you rely on the greed and vices of others. On the Atlantic coast, right off of I-95 lies the Seabrook Kennel Club; just off of I-91, which runs parallel to NH (but on the Vermont side of the Connecticut River) is the Hinsdale Kennel Club and OTB "mini-casino." New Hampshire is also famous for its cut-rate cigarette and booze stores, lottery and state lottery tickets. This is Blackbeard's dream come true a few centuries later. Vice, vice, vice and vice. And don't forget the lung cancer at discount rates.
Thanks to New Hampshire's beneficence and generosity in public spending for its residents, if your kids need special attention in public schools, or your elderly parents need some kind of assisted care facility, but can't afford it -- you might as well be standing on Mount Washington on a cold bad day wearing just a parka.
BUT-- If you do want good schools, and other parts of the whole muncipal scene that help make your town or village a pleasant place to raise a family, well, you just bought into the mother cesspool of all muncipal tax structures could imagine in your worst nightmares. Why even "Taxachusetts," that radical socialist commune to the south of New Hampshire looks even more affordable than most Sunbelt states compared to the Granite State.
Now I don't mind making a few bets now and then. But it's just that, now and then. The State of New Hampshire wants the rest of New England and the nation to put itself in a vice of its own making to feed its coffers. And like the pirates of olden days, and Robber Barons in particular, New Hampshire loves its toll booths, one of which is situated on I-95. Despite the official bilingual "English-French Welcome/Bienvenue to/au New Hampshire," you'll never have to work hard to irritate some of these rather flinty New Englanders.
(If there's anyone particular corner in the nation where manners have been completely thrown to the dogs, it's New England. It's an age old story, but it still bears repeating over and over lest anybody in my neck of the woods becomes complacent and or naive enough to ask why so many people love to vote AGAINST New Englanders in general. Ideology? Nope. Just an indoctrinated false superiority complex. I hate to admit it, but we're not a very nice bunch.
And sometimes we meet somebody who not only does a stellar job of (officially, no less) representing her cheapskate turf, she demonstrated how adept she is in being dumb enough to believe we should take it without a peep of protest.
Today while passing south from the MUCH FRIENDLIER STATE OF MAINE, my wife and I were pulling together the change we needed to pay the buck and a half toll fare. I gave Ruth a paper single and two quarters and she handed it to the toll worker. In two seconds flat, this state employee (or perhaps a very understandably disgruntled former state employee) snapped back at my wife something about having the amount correct -- without even checking to see what we just handed her. But that wasn't enough. In her final act of demonstrating New England/Hampshire charm, the lectured my wife against handing her American nickles and dimes.
"Just give me the dollar and two quarters, I don't need the nickles n' dimes," she snapped, crackled popped and hissed, much to our (then) bewildering ears.
Now, I know Canadian money's taken a jump on Uncle Sam's. But the last time my wife and I checked, New Hampshire's not allowed to prohibit the use of any American money.
Hmmmm, do you think that lady and the "Live Free or Die" state will someday figure this out -- even if somebody from another state is using whatever kinds of coin or paper we have to pay her state's bills?
WARNING: IF YOU ARE A NATIVE NEW HAMPSHIRE GRANITE STATE RESIDENT, OR USED TO LIVE THERE AND ARE PROUD OF YOUR OLD HOME DIGS, YOU MAY NOT WANT TO READ THIS.
New Hampshire on Interstate 95
BUT IT'S LONG OVERUDE -- SO SAITH YOUR BLOGGING COMMENTATOR FROM SOUTH OF THE BORDER IN WHAT YOU FOLKS (A LOT OF YOU BEING FORMER BAY STATE CHEAPSKATES) LIKE TO CALL THE "PEOPLES' REPUBLIC OF TAXACHUSETTS."
THE FORMER BAY STATERS I'M REFERRING TO ARE THOSE WHO'LL JUMP TO WHATEVER PATCH OF GREENER GRASS THEY CAN FIND, JUST SO LONG AS IT DOESN'T REQUIRE THEM ANY EFFORT TO REACH INTO THEIR (ALREADY SHALLOW) POCKETS TO BUY.
GUESS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MOVE INTO A RURAL HICK STATE -- THAT'S STILL ABLE TO BOAST MORE BOULDERS THAN RESIDENTS WITH I.Q.s BARELY AVERAGING ABOVE AN EXTREME ENVIRONMENTALIST'S IDEAL ROOM TEMPERATURE -- FOR THE PRIMARY PURPOSE OF "SAVING TAX DOLLARS"? YOU'LL GET GREENER GRASS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE ALRIGHT. CHANCES ARE MOST OF THAT GREENER GRASS IS GROWING ABOVE SEPTIC TANKS, AND IF SOMETHING HAPPENS? WELL, MMM, YOU KNOW, STUFF HAPPENS.
Some of that stuff is what happens when "Live Free Or Die" is your state motto and your state's sole function is to get everybody living outside of New Hampshire to pay for your way of life. Back when New Hampshire was just a backwoods colony (not much improvement since) and Portsmouth was the only thing resembling a "city," there was another term for what New Hampshire practices today:
Piracy: Now n' Then
Piracy. We live free and you live. Period.
In New Hampshire this takes on a stingier aspect. After all, when you don't have an income tax or even a sales tax, you rely on the greed and vices of others. On the Atlantic coast, right off of I-95 lies the Seabrook Kennel Club; just off of I-91, which runs parallel to NH (but on the Vermont side of the Connecticut River) is the Hinsdale Kennel Club and OTB "mini-casino." New Hampshire is also famous for its cut-rate cigarette and booze stores, lottery and state lottery tickets. This is Blackbeard's dream come true a few centuries later. Vice, vice, vice and vice. And don't forget the lung cancer at discount rates.
NH State Liquor, Tobacco and Lottery Store
Thanks to New Hampshire's beneficence and generosity in public spending for its residents, if your kids need special attention in public schools, or your elderly parents need some kind of assisted care facility, but can't afford it -- you might as well be standing on Mount Washington on a cold bad day wearing just a parka.
BUT-- If you do want good schools, and other parts of the whole muncipal scene that help make your town or village a pleasant place to raise a family, well, you just bought into the mother cesspool of all muncipal tax structures could imagine in your worst nightmares. Why even "Taxachusetts," that radical socialist commune to the south of New Hampshire looks even more affordable than most Sunbelt states compared to the Granite State.
Now I don't mind making a few bets now and then. But it's just that, now and then. The State of New Hampshire wants the rest of New England and the nation to put itself in a vice of its own making to feed its coffers. And like the pirates of olden days, and Robber Barons in particular, New Hampshire loves its toll booths, one of which is situated on I-95. Despite the official bilingual "English-French Welcome/Bienvenue to/au New Hampshire," you'll never have to work hard to irritate some of these rather flinty New Englanders.
(If there's anyone particular corner in the nation where manners have been completely thrown to the dogs, it's New England. It's an age old story, but it still bears repeating over and over lest anybody in my neck of the woods becomes complacent and or naive enough to ask why so many people love to vote AGAINST New Englanders in general. Ideology? Nope. Just an indoctrinated false superiority complex. I hate to admit it, but we're not a very nice bunch.
And sometimes we meet somebody who not only does a stellar job of (officially, no less) representing her cheapskate turf, she demonstrated how adept she is in being dumb enough to believe we should take it without a peep of protest.
Maine: Where People Know How To Live!
Today while passing south from the MUCH FRIENDLIER STATE OF MAINE, my wife and I were pulling together the change we needed to pay the buck and a half toll fare. I gave Ruth a paper single and two quarters and she handed it to the toll worker. In two seconds flat, this state employee (or perhaps a very understandably disgruntled former state employee) snapped back at my wife something about having the amount correct -- without even checking to see what we just handed her. But that wasn't enough. In her final act of demonstrating New England/Hampshire charm, the lectured my wife against handing her American nickles and dimes.
"Just give me the dollar and two quarters, I don't need the nickles n' dimes," she snapped, crackled popped and hissed, much to our (then) bewildering ears.
Now, I know Canadian money's taken a jump on Uncle Sam's. But the last time my wife and I checked, New Hampshire's not allowed to prohibit the use of any American money.
What Is It With Some NH Women?
Hmmmm, do you think that lady and the "Live Free or Die" state will someday figure this out -- even if somebody from another state is using whatever kinds of coin or paper we have to pay her state's bills?
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Comment by S.L.
The Political Brief
As for the toll booth character, it sounds to me like a combination of poor education mixed with poorer attitude. I hope it was an isolated case! lol
Comment by Anonymous
Let's see if I have this right: Is the "big I and little u" the same as the "Great I Am"? Oh, we still have plenty of those -- as does everywhere else. But I'll have to hand it to MA, just on the grounds of being the most populous and full of truly arrogant institutions (mostly known as colleges and institutions, albeit not a far distant cousin of those OTHER institutions) -- not to mention our pols, we probably outdo even NH in this area of concern.
As for that lady in question, I've got a gut-level suspicion she's neither a true "local" of NH, nor an import from Maine. So you can guess where I suspect she made her way from. M'be the poor gal has been harboring a long-festering sense of regret that she got off the interestate a few exits and one bridge too soon and has to deal with all those people from the land she'll NEVER FULLY get away from!
Paying those awful NH property taxes will make anyone grumpy all year 'round. Especially if she's working for an outsourcing firm that the state handed the toll-keepers jobs over to at same pay/no COL and skimpier benefits.
Yep, Life IS Better up in Maine.